fake imagesBirth jitters, lines at Santa’s grotto, and throngs of Christmas lights can make the holiday season a sensory overload for kids before the big day even arrives.
And their mini-crises only add to the stress of parents rushing between school plays, buying gifts, and organizing the family banquet.
Comedian and father-of-three George Lewis tells CBeebies Parenting Download that while his children “love thinking about Christmas”, the disruption to routine can make December “a real internal conflict” for them.
San Mehra, a parenting and child behavior specialist, explains that the combination of high excitement combined with unpredictability is the perfect recipe for “Christmas overwhelm.” George and San share four ways to create a calmer Christmas for your children.
1. Follow some routine
Christmas disrupts normal routines, but San emphasizes that keeping anchor points like waking up, mealtime, and bedtime the same helps kids feel grounded.
“It’s hard for kids to deal with chaos all day long,” she says. “If one part of the routine changes, it’s manageable, but if everything changes, the situation quickly becomes overwhelmed.”
She recommends setting a calendar and marking events like the arrival of family or a trip to see Santa so kids can see what’s coming up and ask questions.
“If you have a child who is anxious about change, you can talk about it and talk about any concerns,” she says.
Most importantly, she adds, parents should schedule downtime as deliberately as activities, as it will help them anticipate whether or not they will have time for certain events.
2. Build your own traditions
fake imagesGeorge once clung to an idealized, movie-style Christmas: perfectly wrapped presents, hearty meals, and a lively house.
But two of their children have autism, and the unpredictability and crowds quickly became overwhelming.
“I always had this version of the perfect Christmas in my head,” he says. “But when my son spent an entire family gathering alone at the end of the garden, I thought: If this isn’t for him, who is it for?”
Now build Christmas around comfort and predictability: staying home, keeping numbers low, and spreading out activities.
A major change was the food itself.
“We’ve stopped making Christmas dinner on Christmas Day,” he explains, and instead cook it on Christmas Eve or Boxing Day.
“Then that same day we didn’t stress about a big project and just played with the kids and had a curry in the evening.”
3. Recognize how they feel
fake imagesEven with careful planning, holiday outings can quickly become overloaded.
And when a crisis occurs, often after a long line or an overstimulating attraction, San says the first step for parents is to check in with yourself.
“Your first instinct is to panic and you may feel embarrassed or stressed, and that’s okay,” he says. But it’s important that you calm down first.
Then he recommends getting down to the child’s level and helping him feel understood.
A simple acknowledgment like, “You’ve been waiting for years, haven’t you? You’re probably fed up by now” can ease the tension.
“If you can name what they’re feeling, like frustration or boredom, the intensity will be reduced by 50%,” he says.
George adds that his family often choose SEND-friendly sessions with less noise and fewer people to help make outings enjoyable rather than overwhelming.
4. . Teaching children to navigate conflict
fake imagesWith unbalanced routines and emotions running high, fights can break out between siblings, as well as cousins or friends they may not see regularly.
When kids crash, San says parents don’t always need to get involved right away. But if things seem like they’re getting worse, he suggests walking them through these stages:
- Separate the children and ask, “Do you want my help or do you want to figure it out yourselves?”
- Set the rules: “They have to be quiet while the other person talks and they have to listen and empathize.”
- Let each child explain what happened and then briefly clarify the sequence.
- Brainstorm solutions together and agree on a
- Come back later to see how it works.
After a while, San says the kids will “start figuring it out themselves” using the same method.





























