Perimenopause at 38? I felt robbed, says Emma Barnett

Broadcaster Emma Barnett said finding out she was going through perimenopause at the age of 38 was like she had been “jumped, robbed”.

Barnett, now 40, said it was “the first time in my life I didn’t really want to be a woman; it’s the first time I thought, ‘I’d really like to be a guy.'”

She spoke on her new BBC podcast, Ready to Talk with Emma Barnett, the first episode of which was released on Friday.

Perimenopause, which commonly occurs around age 46, is when you have menopausal symptoms but your periods have not yet stopped. These symptoms can include anxiety, mood swings, brain fog, hot flashes, and irregular periods.

In the episode, Barnett says that perimenopause made her feel like she lost her identity and that she’s still waiting to “get back” to who she was before.

Speaking to her friend and guest Kate Thornton, she continues: “I feel like there’s been a robbery. I feel like there’s no emergency number to call.

“‘I would like to report a crime. Yes, someone robbed me.’ There is no one who can report this either.”

Thornton, also a journalist and broadcaster, talks about her own experience with perimenopause, saying the “worst” thing she experienced was going from someone “who can multitask… being very capable” to someone who felt “completely incapable.”

Barnett has previously spoken about his health. In 2019, she wrote the book Period: It’s About Bloody Time, which chronicles her experience with endometriosis.

During the podcast episode, she says that it’s “pretty stressful” to share certain parts of her life, but that she “wanted to create this space for other people to be ready to talk about things.”

Barnett, who presented Radio 4’s Woman’s Hour until last year, says she ultimately wanted to do the podcast so she could not only tell others’ stories but also give listeners her perspective and experience.

“I’m usually the interviewer and host,” Barnett tells Thornton.

“It’s not easy to share and I know that, and I think that’s why it’s important that someone you interview does, when it’s appropriate – not all the time, because that’s not my job and it’s not about me – but when it’s appropriate and especially when you’re asking others to do the same, share the same.”

To end the episode, Barnett can be heard saying that he hopes that “the normalization, which we both said needs to happen around perimenopause and this degradation of hormones that happens from…their mid-30s to mid-30s in women, can move into common language.”

“And that doesn’t mean that what happens seems any less extraordinary or scandalous, but the way we deal with it could change,” he adds.

An increasing number of women take hormone replacement therapy (HRT) to relieve menopause symptoms.

HRT increases and stabilizes estrogen levels, sometimes in combination with a synthetic or bioidentical version of progesterone.

But it may not be suitable for people who have a history of some types of cancer, blood clots, and high blood pressure.

Women can also improve how they feel by:

• Eat a balanced diet, low in fat and rich in calcium to strengthen bones and protect the heart.
• exercise regularly, to reduce anxiety, stress and protect against heart disease
• quit smoking, to prevent heart disease and hot flashes
• avoid alcohol, to reduce hot flashes

There is also research to suggest that eating plant estrogens (contained in soybeans and red clover) may help with symptoms.

Talk therapy known as CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) can be offered to women over 40, alongside HRT or, if the patient’s individual circumstances require, instead of it.

Ready to Talk to Emma Barnett is on bbc sounds on November 7 and will be released in weekly episodes.