As soon as Avni sat in front of the teacher in the school PTM, a series of complaints started – “Your son did this, didn’t do this…” Just hearing this, Avni’s face changed. She immediately became tense and started glaring at Aarav. Sitting there, he also asked for clarification from Aarav, as if the whole matter had to be resolved this very moment.
But the truth is that such a reaction may seem like giving respect to the teacher or shows that you are a very disciplined parent, but in reality this method weakens the child’s self-confidence from within. At the time of complaint, the child needs your support the most, not your anger.
Generally, on hearing the complaint of the child, most of the parents react immediately, sometimes by getting angry at the child, sometimes by asking ten questions to the teacher. But the truth is that At such times, remaining calm and responding appropriately is most beneficial for the child’s self-confidence and his future.
the child will not always be wrong
Nowadays, teachers in schools not only teach but also pay attention to the behavior of children, their learning ability and their interactions in the class. In such a situation, if the teacher expresses concern about something, it does not mean that your child is “wrong”, but That he needs some support or guidance in something. And this is the time when the attitude of parents matters a lot.
Parents’ feedback should be like this
First of all, don’t immediately get defensive when you hear the teacher’s feedback. Many times we say without listening, “My child is not like this”, “The teacher must have misunderstood.” But by doing this, teachers are not able to talk openly and the real problem does not come to light. It is better that you listen carefully, do not interrupt and try to understand every point. This will also make the teacher feel that you are taking this matter seriously.
ask questions calmly
After this, calm down and ask some questions, such as when was this problem noticed, how many times did it happen, what was the child’s reaction, and under what circumstances this behavior was observed. like this Not only will you be able to understand the clear picture, but the teacher will also feel that you want to solve the problem collaboratively.
Talk to your child like this
Now comes the time to talk to the child. Many parents, after hearing the teacher’s complaint, immediately start scolding the child at home. But by doing this the child becomes closed and next time he becomes afraid to tell something. Therefore, talk to the child in a calm environment, while maintaining his trust. Tell him what the teacher said, but not in a way that embarrasses him, but in a way that allows him to express himself openlyAsk them, “What happened at school today?”, “How did you feel?”, “Are you having trouble with anything?” Often children themselves tell their real problems, sometimes friendship problems, sometimes pressure in studies, sometimes fear, sometimes just misunderstanding.
listen without judging
When you listen to the child without judging, he develops confidence that his parents are with him. After this, both of you can make a small plan together, like changing the way you practice, talking to the teacher again, or handling a situation at school in a new way.
You will get this benefit from the entire process
The real benefit of this entire process is that the child learns that problems are not something to be feared, but solvable. He gains confidence, his conversation habits improve and he feels safe.
Remember that teacher feedback is not an accusation, but an opportunity to further improve your child’s development. Just listen, support and empower him, the child will automatically improve.
